This week has been a very ordinary one, very busy filled with work, school, the Mr working and out alot and me doing plenty of solo parenting and bedtimes, the usual household shopping, cooking, cleaning and days going by without you even realising it. So ordinary that I contemplated not writing a post this week, that really I had nothing to say and no particular photos to share either. Today the Mr is away on a stag do, it has been a relaxed day at home, we have had friends pop in both this morning and this afternoon and have generally just played, it has been really lovely. As I headed towards another solo bedtime I ushered two tired little ladies up the stairs and they immediately ran into my room and onto my bed, stripping off and snuggling under the blanket together giggling and shouting for me to come and join them. And there it was. A very ordinary moment that is in fact so ordinary I hardly register it in the day anymore. And I guess that’s what it’s all about, about the ordinary routine that seems so ingrained you will never forget it yet it changes so subtly day by day, week by week and year by year that you don’t notice and it’s gone in the blink of an eye.
Each day before the Little Ladies get ready for the land of nod, we all lie on my bed, let off steam from the day, wind down – or up as the case may be for them – just cuddle and relax. Sometimes we read books, sometimes they pillow fight and I have to mediate as one or the other of them ploughs head first towards the edge of the bed losing all sense of danger in their moment of happiness, and sometimes we talk to each other and make up stories that E asks to please remember forever so she can hear them a thousand times over. But it is a moment I love, a simple moment with no distractions and the promise of bedtime, that the exhausting day that is parenting is almost over, at least for a few hours. And for those few seconds I want to press that pause button again, not to have to be the person to ask them to stop giggling and go and get dressed, to brush their teeth and please calm it down; but to just lie there with them and soak in all the details this moment allows.
I notice how blonde my littlest lady’s hair is as the evening sun streams through the bedroom window and makes it almost transparent, how sparkly E’s eyes are and how R’s face, smile and open mouth belly laugh has completely changed now she has teeth. I stop and appreciate how far E’s legs stretch down the bed, how with each passing day she gets more and more moles covering her skin just like me and we play dot to dot as she wriggles from being so ticklish. I notice R has that first mole on her shoulder and wonder how long it has been there. I want to study them both so closely and never ever forget what they look like at this moment in time and as I do I see that R no longer looks like a baby at all, she no longer looks too little to walk, to talk and that bright red birthmark that used to consume her whole forearm is now less significant.
I am not sure when the small changes in them become so big, I am the first one on tough days to pray for bedtime to come around quickly, to wish for the weekend or for the littlest to go through the next milestone, get the next tooth, to sleep a little better or communicate more as it inevitably makes life that little bit simpler and easier. Yet a huge part of me is sad, sad that this is the last time, sad that as my littlest grows that bit easier my biggest grows that little bit more independent and I am totally not ready for that. What I am totally ready for and remind myself daily is that their bond is continually growing as they are, and that there is always always amazing times to come.
I love these photo’s of my two, they get so so excited by one another that it is so hard to get them both in the frame and still (ish) but what I was able to capture was them actually kissing. Now anyone who has met E knows that although an absolutely brilliant big sister she runs a mile at the sheer prospect of her little sisters wide open mouth or slobbery kisses coming in her direction, yet tonight she leaned in, she chased her around the bed just to plant kisses on her lips and the joy and excitement on R’s face – and the utter shock – was clear to see. And as much as I wanted to capture it, to get that perfect photograph, much more than that I wanted to be in it, to be as much a part of this moment as they were. So I put the camera down, piled on and snuggled into my babies for 5 minutes longer than time usually allows, to have them clamber all over me and shower each other with kisses, just because we can.
I know that I will treasure these forever, not just for the photos themselves but for the ordinary moment they represent.
Linking with Katie Mummy Daddy Me for the Ordinary Moments
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